Rice Boy Explained
............... or at least what I think it is all about.
I used to have a direct link to Bryan's Rice Boy web page on my home page. Thinking twice about it, I wanted people to read the following before going to his site. If you want to go there now and bypass my spiel, please click here.
Not too long ago, I stumbled onto this web page called Bryan's Rice Boy Page. I instantly thought, WOW, this web page is incredibly funny. I found myself rolling on the floor laughing and I kept going back for more. Picture after picture, story after story, it was all way too hilarious. After I completed going through the entire site, the content of the site started to disturb me somewhat. Oh well, I thought, it's only a web site poking fun at a stereotype. No harm done. I understood what the author was doing, and how he and thousands of others felt about this so called Rice Boy phenomena.
Over time I started to come across more and more automobile performance web sites that included a link to Bryan's Rice Boy page. What I found disturbing was that some of these web sites use Bryan's web page to promote hate towards Asians and import automobiles. This is not what Bryan intended, but nonetheless this seems to be a popular trend -- especially with the Mustang sites. Here is an example of a posting from one of these web pages:
Where did you dumbass Asians and your stupid import cars come from? The track is crawling with you losers. I used to get lots of runs on the track. Now I get three maybe four passes. Take your 5 inch fart tips and go back to where you come from and leave us real racers alone.
That was a mild one. There are worse. One guy has a Mustang page where he has an animated gif of a person urinating on Honda and Nissan logos. Below, there's a caption that reads, "If you own an import with a 5 inch fart tip, click here and don't come back!" The link, of course, is to Bryan's Rice Boy page. Many of these pages also have guest books and they are full of "imports suck" postings and replies.
Bryan, the originator of the term Rice Boy, claims that Rice Boy is not derogatory or racist. He goes on to justify this by saying that everyone, including Asians, Caucasians, and what have you, eats rice, so what's the big deal? Why he came up with RICE and not wheat, pork, or salami as a descriptor is beyond me. Anyway, since when is making fun of a person or a group of people's beliefs, attitudes, and ideals not derogatory or racist? Homosexuals, Christians, Americans, smokers, gun owners, Deadheads, are examples of groups of people who are not part of a race.
What I truly find entertaining, however, about Bryan's web page are the comments and replies he receives from the surfers of his site. Check out this one from a female Asian.
Oh joy that the World Wide Web is quickly becoming indispensable to our existence for I've forever had the urge to vent my annoyances on an international scale about those so-called Rice Boys, of which there are tons and tons and tons here in southern California and, so I am told, throughout North America, unfortunately. Vroom vrrrooom! Now, I offer a uniquely Asian female viewpoint on this ever growing subculture of eraser-headed losers, so listen up! After reading this you will no longer wonder why so many of us jump ship and go for white guys.
I speak on behalf of all attractive, intelligent, goal-oriented Asian women out there when I say I have way, way, way better things to do than sit in the passenger seat alongside a wanna-be-hard Rice Boy and his 30-plus entourage of like-minded friends on a Friday or Saturday night. Just who do you think you are zipping around in those slammed Japanese sportsters and trying, though failing miserably, to look and be cool, all the meanwhile disturbing the peace and quiet in the process? Do you honestly think your machismo front is fooling the public? No, seriously? Do you? Well, think again!
The truth is, the lengths you Rice Boys go to slam your base-model Civics, Sentras, Integras, and Eclipses, then conceitedly showcase them to the public, are so ridiculous that I, and numerous others as fellow Asians, feel positively embarrassed for you! Just what do those tacky white racing stripes, oversized spoilers, booming sound systems, and pitch black windows, among the many, many, many other annoying, pointless additions, do to enhance your value as a person? Your expensive toy will prove utterly useless just a few years from now when suddenly you are forced to say hello to the real world and finally abandon your meaningless little hobby. Wake up, people!
What fun it will be to watch you get left in the dust as other, more respectable Asians successfully brave the ugly world as adults, leaving you to wish you were involved in somewhat less idiotic activities as youths. Yeah, that's right. You will at some point be forced to get real lives and part with your pathetic Rice Boy existence, but by then it will likely be too late to redeem what could have been. I suppose those of us with real aspirations should be grateful for this only further opens the doors of opportunity for us. For shame though, isn't it, that those long hours you spent carefully perfecting speedracer-mobile will be all for naught! Well, don't come crying to us once reality gives you a cold slap in the face. All well have to offer to little loser you is a smug "I told you so."
Now bring on dem white boys!
Then some Asian males reply to her letter -- pleading to give Asian males a second chance.
Sheeeeeesh............
Here is another example...............
I thought that your page was pretty cool except that you put my brother's car on the web. It is the pink neon with the thrust sign on the side. I'd appreciate if you could not post it on the web. I'm not going to tell him about this site because if he saw his car on the web he'd be pissed. Thanks.
I don't think pissed would be his reaction. If he's like me, he would be devastated. To car enthusiasts, a car is not just a car. Why would anyone drive an MG Midget, Citroen <sp?>, or a Volkswagen Beetle? Why do people spend endless amounts of money restoring old cars? Because these people love their cars and they have a vision and a passion for what they own!
Why would anyone get enjoyment out of hurting other people? If you hate people who make their cars look fast that much, try to change them by educating them. It's much more effective than simply putting them down.
Here's a comment from Bryan's web page that really pisses me off.
I own a 1994 rx-7 and these 110 hp burner econoboxes make me want to throw up. They want to compare exhaust tips and sticker packages, and I just want to ignore them. I have an Akimoto bazooka tube coming out the end of my car, but it is built to handle and puts out 300 hp. These guys don't understand that they have taken cars that are only designed to provide miles per gallon, and destroy them by ripping out the interior, stripping out all the weight and turning their no-torque peg-leg motors that had 100 hp into worthless large paperweights with no resale value that now have 110 hp. If they want to go fast, buy something with a little balls. If they want to support the rising sun, then buy a supercharged mr-2, or an NSX, or a z-car, or and RX-7. And if all they want to do is go fast, do like everyone else and buy a mustang, put on a Vortech puffer, and be done with it. 15 second quarter mile ET's are nothing to be proud of.
Getting that econo, 100 hp car to do 15 second or less quarter mile ET is the challenge, chump! I can go out and buy an RX-7 any time I want, but choose not to. The point behind performance upgrading is just that, improving what you've got and being proud of the accomplishments. I am not going to take on a V-8 Mustang or an RX-7 and hope to skunk it. One thing's for sure, I'll be able to keep up to them in my pathetic little econobox and keep the change, to boot. Before I got into modifying and upgrading my car, it was worth at the most, $5000.00 Canadian (a car that's been paid for). It's still worth that much even with all that aftermarket stuff, but the car performs like new and the total cost after improvements is still far below what a new car would cost (1999 Civic Si goes for $23, 000.00). And well below what an RX-7 would cost. Support the Rising Sun? What's that all about?
Other terms that have come from Rice Boy.
Rice Rocket
Rice Quotient (like Intelligence Quotient) Thank goodness my RQ is not very high!